Saying the most inappropriate thing

When it comes to saying the most inappropriate thing to the person that matters to u a lot, well I guess I am the king (lol). Really I've found myself uttering the most ridiculous sentences, which on later reflecting, found myself wanting to kick myself.

But the damage is always done. I've never been able to fathom why it happens and what provokes those words. Is it some frustration? Some kind of overt eagerness? Some adrenaline rush? 

Whatever it is, I guess at the instant the mind is in a blocked state to really process the words that are coming out. 

Today I had one such incident happen to me. It wasn't a face to face talk rather on a chat. But the effect was the same.

As a person who thinks a lot in a short time, and with the thoughts coming in at a rapid pace I guess I dont want to lose the thoughts that are flowing in and those that I want to  pass on, and as a result probably I don't rethink the thought I am trying to pass on and hence the situation.

I really ought to slowdown my thinking a bit. (lol)

Where's the Restroom!!?

On my recent trip to Washington DC, I had this very odd experience. We were a group of 5 who went to DC to see the cherry blossom/parade and we had parked our car at a train station (Greenbelt) and took the train to go and see the parade as our first stop. The moment I stepped into the train, I felt the well known urge, the urge to relieve the bladder. Caused by the two bottles of water that I had whilst we were driving down. I need a lot of water on a day to day basis (around a gallon (4litres) ).

Coming back to the incident, I felt this uncontrollable urge, but I didnt much mind, coz i knew that in another 20-25 mins we will reach the destination and at the destination station I would be able to relieve myself. Well I get down at the station and frantically look for the restroom, but none around!. So coming out of the station I scan around for a few restaurants or something that would house a restroom. Still no avail! Now nothing else going on my mind. My friends were calling me for a foto shoot, well dang!! not the time for it!! and then i came across a President's Memorial building, and I saw people going into it. So I went down there and there was a security screening at the entrance. I thought what the heck!!!? but nevertheless asked a security female if there was a restroom inside and she nodded positively but said I needed to produce an ID Card. I couldnt believe what I was hearing an Identity Card for a pee!! but she was insistent and so I had to run back to my friends who were holding on to my bag, happily shooting away pictures, got my passport identitification, produced it to the security female, and almost literally ran inside and then asked at the information counter inside for the directions to the restroom.

Then I found the restroom. !!!!

Boy I was really glad when I relieved myself. Felt floating in heaven.

The highlight of this incident was that I had used the Presidents Memorial Building for a restroom (ROFL).

more later ....

Before my Washington DC/Baltimore trip

I always have some sort of a mixed feeling the eve of a trip. I wouldn't really classify it as a flustered state of mind. Maybe a tad anxious. Anxious as to what I should be taking and what I should be leaving back. But I have to admit, I am no light traveller. I am a being who's zone of comfort is the home, no matter how much I love to travel around. There are all these articles at home that I need to have around me for me to feel comfortable I guess. My gadgets, grooming stuff, cologne collection,clothes all that I am leaving back. I am always wondering what I might need out of the blue, at the trip. I do have a few occassions, where my planning has paid off, but I've faced the mockery of my mates most of the times. Well I don't mind that however. I guess I am a person, by nature who cannot be disturbed for extended periods of time. 

Even today, I'm packing in trivia for the trip, some chargers, flashlight (would i need it?) My packing has been real slow because of the India-NZ series decider test going on live. Sometimes I tend to get carried over and digressed. Well hey don't we all? Anyways I guess I am done packing, the digi-cams are ready. Now I feel a tad excited over the trip and no longer have that anxious feeling. 

I should try and find something interesting to write down, than jus a documentary sort of blog, which holds nothing but a mundane set of thoughts. I need to pen down the technical stuff on software for a change. I've always found that I have a way of putting together analogies to help myself understand  a concept better and in a deeper visual manner. 

Well my thoughts are drifting and am gonna hit the sack...

Decision Graph

I've heard about people who are of an exceptional IQ but fail to succeed and rather come across such folks as well. I've seen them at work, at school and bumped into such guys. You have a feeling that this guy/gal ought not to be here, you feel he/she doesn't belong in this group. And you have come across this other folks, folks who seem so mundane, yet they keep climbing up the ladder and are in enviable positions. Well we attribute this to that guy's luck (I've done that as well) or we claim he lick's the boss's ass. Maybe those are reasons as well, but I do feel that I am being biased or rather unappreciative of some factor or attribute characteristic of that guy that has made him prosperous. After all we do most of the time see only one side of the coin always. Well I'll talk about the way we see things in another post. 

So what if these "successful" people did possess some ability the others who should've been successful didn't posses!? I strongly believe that we are what we are only because of ourselves and no one else to blame. What I'm trying to convey is that we are soley responsible for where we stand only we stand to be blamed for it, be it good or be it bad. 

Our lives totally revolve around decision making. We make decisions right from the time we wake up , to decide whether to wake up on the first alarm or to wake up after a snooze or to sleep for an hour more. All the time we are deciding. We decide on what breakfast to have, on what excuse to present to the boss for the delay, we decide on what movie to watch, how to study, how much time to study, how to approach a problem, how to design a solution and all of that leads to different outcomes and would've lead to different outcomes had an alternate course been taken. Our life rather would rather look like a lot of "if" "else if" "else" conditions. True sometimes life does present us with alternate paths because the option we have chose doesn't seem to work out. I'll come to that a little later. But what I am trying to say, is the whole life travels in sort of  a decision path that we take. 

And our decisions are affected in large by our emotional state and vigilance and influence from others as well. You could very well blame someone else for your decision claiming you got influecned, but being influenced in itself is our own fault/decision again. So if in our emotional status we failed to notice an opportunity or if we take up an opportunity by being vigilant we either become unsuccessful (read unlucky) or successful (lucky). 

This emotional state of being vigilant is probably a key difference in being succesful. Probably this is what is one aspect of being emotionally intelligent!. What I call vigilance is just being aware of the environment around you, or being aware of what the world is seeking and being vigilant in this aspect probably makes you look for a way out of a situation/problem and hey you become a hero, though you didn't really contribute to the solution, the fact that you reacted to the situation and acted as a liasion to provide a solution is what matters in a lot of situations.

So in effect I probably am lead to believe and now do believe that we are what we are based on the decision graph that we make and the decision path that we travel on. 

This interesting viewpoint gives me an interesting state of mind, where I do manage not to blame those around me. Gives a better feeling of self and rather makes think of taking non-emotional decisions. Lets see where it takes me ahead...